


Black & White

by AnkaBaiam



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Confused Magnus Bane, Dreams vs. Reality, Hopeful Ending, Love, M/M, Mystery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-27
Updated: 2018-09-08
Packaged: 2019-07-03 08:56:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 19,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15815634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnkaBaiam/pseuds/AnkaBaiam
Summary: Magnus hasn't feel anything in a long time. His life is black and white, but there's someone, who actually can make him feel things again. Or is there? And who is He? Why does Magnus suddenly feel sad? What are those dreams coming anytime he's with Him?AKA: Magnus is confused, lost in his life, but there is someone who can help him, but nothing is as it seemed in the beginning. Also everything is connected.FINISHED





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, I was gone for long time… but I am back now!  
> This story is finished, so updates every day! Yay!

Magnus' life was boring. Black and white. Literally. Because the thing is, that there are no colours in Magnus' world. There used to be, and then, one day, the colours just disappeared.   
But that was long time ago and Magnus doesn't even remember what they felt like anymore. His life was boring. It was plain. Prim even. His days seemed like never ending loop.  
He used to enjoy life, but now there was this huge hole. Something that was missing, but no matter how hard Magnus tried, he couldn't figure out what was missing.  
  
Every morning he woke up exactly at 6 am, dressed, ate breakfast, got ready to work and headed on small train station. Exactly at 6.51 the train came and Magnus got on. Some days he was driving with his friend from nearby village, the other days, he put on his headphones, sat on his seat and watched the outside world from behind the window.  
Even the passengers were always the same people. Magnus knew them all. He knew where they were getting on and off. He knew what their good or bad days were. The black woman with scar on her neck sitting on the seat which was the closest to the door.   
The man in suit, having someone important on the phone, never sitting down and running out of the door the second it opened. On fifth stop from the depo, second stop after Magnus', a couple got on. They never talked much, because the red haired girl spent whole the time looking on her phone, meanwhile her boyfriend tried to get her attention.  
With some of the passengers was easy to talk with, the others usually silently sat and looked in nowhere.  
There was always a few people getting on and off the train on each stop except the eleventh one. No one ever got off the train there.  
Magnus' seat was the one in back of the train, next to the window, from where Magnus could see exactly who got on and off the train.  
He listened to the music and thought about life of the others. Where are they from? How do they live? With whom? What is their story?  
The train stopped exactly twelve times. Magnus was getting on the third stop. That meant nine more stops before the final station.  
When they 35 minutes later finally reached the terminus, Magnus waited until everyone else exited the train, before he himself walked out.  
The station was quiet in the mornings and Magnus appreciated that. The only people there, were the tourists, who were trying to find their trains or slept on the benches. Magnus passed them every morning, not paying any attention to them, knowing that they are going to be gone soon. That their paths will never meet again.  
He walked on the metro and entered. He drove for 5 minutes. 3 stations. 2 stops. He got off the metro and entered the building which was his work. It wasn't anything special. Just another grain of sand on the beach.  
Magnus felt invisible in the office. His co workers were walking around him, talking, laughing, but Magnus wasn't there. He didn't see nor hear anything. He was there, but wasn't. After few long hours Magnus finally left the building and headed back on the train, going home.  
Day by day. Simple rutin. Never changing.  
  
And then one day here he was.   
The new month began and Magnus stood on the small train station, at 6.51 the train arrived. Magnus got on the train and took a deep breath, smelling the typical smell of the train. He looked around himself on what seemed as not so comfortable seats, which in winter nicely warmed on the back.  
Magnus headed in the back of the wagon, to sit on his seat. But it was already taken.  
Here he was.  
The young man sitting on Magnus' seat.   
Magnus frowned. That never happened before.  
He walked to the man and stood in front of him until the intruder looked up on Magnus. He had big sad eyes and Magnus suddenly couldn't be angry on him anymore. The man didn't say anything.   
Magnus frowned. "You are sitting on my seat." Magnus whispered. The man didn't say anything and just stood up, walking toward the door. Magnus sat on his seat and looked from the window. He couldn't help himself, but to wonder. Who was that man?  
Magnus looked away from the window and his eyes found the stranger standing next to the door. The young man was leaning against the wall, his eyes glued to the floor. It wasn't until eight stops later when the man finally looked up.  
His eyes met Magnus' and Magnus gasped.  
The man's eyes were blue.  
Before he could do nor say anything, the man was gone. Magnus was breathing quickly. What was happening?  
He haven't seen colours in months. He already forgot how beautiful they were. How happy they seemed. How was it possible? Who was that man? Why did he got off the train on the eleventh stop?   
Yet another mystery.   
\- The man's eyes were blue.  
\- He got off on the eleventh stop.  
  
Magnus was going to find out who he was. He had to. He had to find his blue eyed angel.  



	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Station 1

If Magnus was on the train station earlier the next day, no one needs to know. He impatiently waited for the train to come and as soon as the door opened, he jumped in, rushing to his seat to see if the stranger was there.  
He was.  
And he was once more time sitting on Magnus' seat. Magnus stood up in front of him again and waited for him to look up. The man did, but to Magnus' disappointment his eyes were black and white again.  
He sighed as he spoke up. "You are sitting on my seat." He whispered sadly. The younger man looked on him for few seconds before he smiled on Magnus and sat on the seat in front of where he was sitting before.  
Magnus sat on his seat and looked on the man who was watching him with a smile. Magnus frowned and moved his attention out of the window.  
They were going few minutes in silence.  
"Have you ever been there?" The man suddenly asked and gosh... Magnus wanted to hear him talk more often. His voice was a melody to his ears. Magnus looked on the man and thought about his question. He shook his head. He never was there. He always drove on the last station. He never got off on earlier station.  
"That's shame." The man said, looking out of the window. "It's beautiful place."  
"Have you... Have you ever been out there?" Magnus stuttered.  
Why was he nervous?  
The man shook his head as he smiled. "We should go there." He offered and Magnus frowned. The train started slowing down as it approached the fourth stop. First since Magnus' stop. The man chuckled as he stood up. "Come on, what's the worst thing that can happen?"  
The train stopped.  
Magnus looked out of the window and back on the man.  His eyes suddenly shined. They were blue again. Magnus gasped.  
So it wasn't a dream after all.  
The man raised his hand toward Magnus. He looked on the hand and before he could change his mind, he took it. What's the worst thing that could probably happen? The man chuckled as he ran, dragging Magnus behind himself.  
As they got off the wagon, the door closed and the train disappeared, driving toward the next stop. Magnus kept looking behind the leaving vehicle, until it disappeared completely under the horizon.  When he couldn't see it anymore, he looked back on the man. His eyes weren't blue anymore.  
Magnus took a second to look around himself, to see where he was. He always saw the places from the window. He actually was never there. And now standing here, Magnus was amazed.  
"Wow." he couldn't help but to confess.  
"Yeah." the man chuckled. "Come on! Let's go!" he chuckled as he took Magnus' hand and wanted to head somewhere, but Magnus was still frozen on the place.  
"What?" the man asked as he turned around to look on Magnus. "What am I doing?" Magnus asked. More himself then the man. "I don't know you. I have work to attend. Why am I here?"  
The man chuckled. "My name is A." he introduced. A? Magnus frowned. "Magnus." he shook A's hand.  
"See, now we are not strangers anymore, shall we go?" Magnus nodded unsurely. After all, what other choice he had now? He already broke his habit.  
"So… A?" he asked as they started walking. "What kind of name is that?" The man chuckled, looking on the road in front of them. "Not everyone can have such nice name like you Magnus." Magnus. Magnus shivered at the way A. pronounced his name.  
He didn't know A. at all, but yet he had such a big effect on Magnus.  
  
They walked side by side through the city. It was a nice place. And pleasant company. Magnus soon found out that talking to A. was probably the easiest thing to do.  
"Don't you also have a work you should be in?" A. looked at him and shrugged. "I have more important thing to do now." He said. "Right," Magnus scoffed. "Such as wasting your time with me."  
A. looked on him with teasing smile. "Magnus," he said kindly, "no one is going to kill you just because you weren't in work for few days."  "And it's not waste of time. With you never." He added so quietly that Magnus almost hadn't heard him.  
"Few days?" Magnus asked with a frown. "Yeah." A. chuckled, "there are still 8 more stops." Magnus raised his eyebrows. "You seriously want to get off on all of them?" He asked. "On every single of them." He specified, while looking on Magnus. "With you." A. added.  
"Why me?" Magnus couldn't help but to wonder. "Because I like you." A. confessed very quietly. "Because you saved me, so let me save you now." Magnus frowned, but didn't dare to say anything.  
They got talking about everything and nothing as they were walking through the city and admiring it's buildings. Magnus was surprised how quickly the time flew by. When they reached the beach, the sun was slowly falling down.  
The bird chirping was fading away and the only sound were the waves crashing on the land.  
It was a beautiful view. But what amazed Magnus the most, was the fact, that he could see the colours.  
They weren't bright. They were barely there. Just a shades. But it was enough for Magnus. Because it was beautiful. Magnus was smiling as they were walking side by side with A., looking out on the wide ocean and descending sun.  
Suddenly A. pushed him toward the water, where another wave was coming. Magnus yelped in surprise, running back on the dry land, jumping on A. jokingly. The younger man caught him as he laughed.  
"Someone is scared of water?" He teased as Magnus pulled away from him, but their hands stayed close. Before Magnus could change his mind, he took A's hand in his own and intertwined their fingers.  
He knew A. barely for few hours, but being with him felt so familiar, so easy. They kept walking on the sand for few more minutes, in silence, holding hands.  
And it was nice.  
Out of the blue A. did it again. He pushed Magnus closer to the ocean, but this time, when Magnus tried to escape the waves, A. caught him and kept him on the place. Soon the wave crushed in them and splashed them.  
Magnus yelped as the cold water soaked his clothes and drawer closer to A. who was the whole time laughing quietly. Magnus looked up on him and saw A's blue eyes shining again.  
Suddenly the cold water didn't bother him anymore. The only thing he wanted to do at that time was to get closer to A. Suddenly Magnus wanted more.  
"What?" A. asked with nervous chuckle. "Your eyes are beautiful." Magnus could help but to confess his thoughts. He put carefully his hand on A's cheek as he brushed it gently.  
A. didn't move. Magnus moved closer, dragging A. down cautiously, giving him time to move away.  
But he didn't.  
Magnus closed his eyes and leaned in the kiss.  
  
_Suddenly Magnus heard people counting down. It was New Year countdown. He came there together with his friends Ragnor and Catarina, Raphael joined them later._  
**_10…_**  
_Alec came with his siblings, Isabelle and Jace. Magnus has never met them before. Until now. He saw Alec as soon as he entered the party and he kept an eye on him since. When their eyes finally met, Alec smiled on him shyly._  
_Magnus dared to walk over to the group._  
**_9…_**  
_He greeted Alec and his siblings, asking for permission to steal Alec away._  
_After all, that night was supposed to be their first date, right?_  
**_8…_**  
_"Hi." Magnus whispered as they were finally alone. "Hi." Alec greeted, blushing so much, that Magnus saw it even in the darkness. "I missed you." Magnus whispered, as he leaned closer to Alec, the younger man blushed hardly. "I heard there are free drinks." Alec teased him with a shy smile and Magnus laughed. "Is that why you came?" he joked and Alec shrugged. "I don't know, is it?"_  
**_7…_**  
_"Do you maybe want to head on the beach?" Magnus offered, seeing that Alec isn't very comfortable in the crowd._  
_Alec nodded. "Please."_  
**_6…_**  
_The sun was already hidden under the horizon, but the lights from the near party were shinning enough for the men to see where they were walking. It was quiet. The birds already sleeping. The voices fading away. Just Alec and Magnus. Just the waves crushing onto the shore._  
**_5…_**  
_"You look really astonishing tonight Alexander." Magnus confessed his thoughts as he stopped walking and faced him. Alec scoffed. "Have you seen yourself?" he asked, looking down on his hands._  
**_4…_**  
_"I have." Magnus said, taking Alec's hands in his owns, "But yet, you are the most beautiful man I have ever seen."_  
_Alec smiled shyly._  
**_3…_**  
_"Can I kiss you?" Magnus asked quietly, as the crowd started counting down._  
_Alec nodded lightly and Magnus leaned closer to Alec._  
**_2…_**  
_He looked in Alec's blue eyes as their lips almost touched._  
**_1..._**  
_Their lips met._  
_It was careful kiss. Figuring out how far it will go._  
_The fireworks around them started shooting in the sky. The colours bursting all around them. People laughing._  
  
A. opened his mouth, letting Magnus inside. Both men fighting for dominance. Eventually Magnus took the lead, and gosh... kissing A. was now his favourite thing to do. When they parted, there weren't any people. The fireworks were gone. They have been alone on the quiet beach.  
Weird.  
A. was looking on him, breathing equally hard as Magnus, with his lips parted. He looked blessed. Magnus couldn't stand the distance between them.  
He pressed against A. and kissed him again.  
Both of them were still standing in the cold water, but neither of the men actually paid attention to it. After few more minutes of heated making out, Magnus finally pulled away from A.  
His eyes were still shining bright blue and Magnus couldn't make himself to look away.  
He put his hand on A's cheek and stroke it slowly. A. was smiling on him with a blush on his face.  
Magnus chuckled, pressing their foreheads together. "How about we get off the cold water?" A. suggested with a smirk.  
Both men laughed quietly, intertwining their hands as they walked back on the dry land and headed back on the train station. They waited for the train and got on. Their fingers intertwined, playing with each other, their hands softly brushing...  
Magnus' heart was doing things to him. He never believed that there could be such feeling. Such love. But he had known A. for barely a day, how could that be?  
As the train started slowing down, Magnus looked up in A's blue eyes and smiled. "I will see you tomorrow?" He asked quietly and A. nodded. "Okay." Magnus smiled as he disintertwined their hands slowly.  
"See you soon." A. whispered as the door opened ad Magnus exited the wagon. He turned around just at the moment, when the door closed. Magnus wanted to wave A. goodbye, but the younger men wasn't there anymore.  
He frowned, watching the train leaving toward the next station.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please as always, leave comment, kudos I appreciate everything! See you on tomorrow update ;)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Station 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you maybe noticed, the story line with Alec is always in Italic, but AO3 is destroying my format when posting, so maybe somewhere it still looks normal, sorry for the mistakes :)

The next morning Magnus woke up at 6 am, got dressed, ate breakfast and left his apartment, walking on the train. As soon as the wagon door opened, Magnus jumped in, rushing to his seat.  
He was there.  
Magnus couldn't help but to smile, as he sat in front of Alec who hadn't even notice him yet. Magnus smiled again as he sat and let himself to enjoy the view. He couldn't believe that they kissed. How did he get so lucky?  
_Magnus watched Alec as he focused on his book, frowning time from time. He was beautiful. "Good morning." he greeted, knowing Alec probably got lost in the book laying on his lap. The younger man finally looked up from the book he was reading._  
"Good morning." he smiled on him and Magnus got lost in A's blue eyes for few seconds. "What are you reading?" Magnus asked and A. frowned. "Hm?"  
"The book you are reading?" Magnus repeated pointing on A's lap, but there was nothing. Magnus frowned. "Sorry. I uh… Just forget it." Magnus frowned, hiding his head in his hands. Is he going crazy?  
"Magnus? Hey? Mags?" A. calling him brought Magnus back. He blinked few times as he looked on A. "Hi." A. whispered when Magnus finally came back. "Hi." Magnus whispered back. "Where have you been?" A. asked carefully and Magnus shrugged. "Just thinking." he lied.  
"You don't have to lie to me Magnus," A. said quietly, "you never have to, okay?" Magnus felt the tears coming to his eyes. How did A. know he was lying? He barely knew him, but yet everything seemed so… familiar?  
A. carefully took Magnus' hand and looked straight in his eyes. Magnus sighed as he squeezed A's hand for support. "Do you ever get the… déjà vu feeling?" he asked in the end, looking up, "that feeling, when you are standing somewhere or doing something, and you just feel like it happened already?"  
"That you have already been there, already done that, but you just can't remember what exactly happened?" A. was looking on him with understanding look, but didn't say anything.  
"You feel like you can touch the memory, like you can actually remember it, but when you try to reach for it, you find out that it's too far away from you to be able to get it?"  
"It's okay Magnus," A. finally spoke up, "it happens to all of us." he assured him. "It's scientific fact, because human mind is very complicated but yet amazing at the same time." Magnus looked up on A.  
"It can be caused by the fact that the information is transferring from one side of the brain to the other which causes that sometimes you get the information twice which then makes you think that it already happened before."  
Magnus nodded, forcing a smile. "You are pretty clever." He whispered and A. chuckled. "You are pretty nice." He teased with a smirk as Magnus shook his head with scoff.  
The train started slowly down as the second stop came. Both men chuckled, intertwining their fingers. "Shall we go?" A. asked and Magnus nodded.  
The train reached the second stop. At that moment A. jumped out of his seat and with smile dragged Magnus out of the train. The door behind them closed and the vehicle left the station.  
"So what now?" Magnus asked as he finally caught his breath. A. looked at him with chuckle. "Now we go and discover." He reached his hand toward Magnus and waited until the other man took it.  
Magnus smiled as they connected their hands and headed in the city. They were both nicely surprised how different the city was. The first city they have been to was a modern one. A normal one.  
But this one? This city looked as if it was built in the 60's. Magnus just waited for the camera crew to drive out from somewhere, but it never did. The city was truly beautiful. It was nice place, especially in the shines of the falling sun. It wasn't too crowded.  
Magnus brushed his hand against A's. He felt the shivering flow through his body. A. was the first one to intertwine their fingers. Magnus felt the warmth consuming his chest. "Do you want an ice cream?" A. asked at one point and Magnus nodded.  
"Which flavour do you want?" A. asked and Magnus thought about it. "Surprise me." he said in the end and A's face lightened up. "Hm…" A. thought about it, "I don't think you are ordinary-flavour kind of guy…" Magnus smiled. He was curious which flavour he will end up with.  
"So, no vanilla, nor chocolate…" A. continued thinking aloud, looking on the flavour choice. "I got it!" "Here you go." A. said with a smile as he handed Magnus the green coloured ice cream. "What is it?" Magnus frowned, taking it, "Pistacia." A. announced proudly. Magnus smiled. "Now is my turn." he said as he looked in the window display.  
_"Come on Alec!" Magnus groaned, "I can't choose the flavour." the younger man chuckled. "Why not?" Magnus sighed, "What if I choose some horrible one and you will hate it?" Alec laughed. "I trust you Magnus." Magnus shook his head. "That is awful decision, really."_  
_Magnus was choosing the flavour for few more seconds. In the end he decided for Mango. He handed Alec the corn and watched him closely. "Mhm…" Alec hummed, "it's… good…" he said._  
_Magnus frowned. "You hate it." he said quietly.  Alec looked at Magnus with innocent look. "It's good," he said again, "it's just not… my style." Magnus sighed as he hid his face in his hands. "I told you." he whispered, "Do not trust me ever again."_  
_Alec started laughing. "It's alright Magnus." He smiled on him. "How about you buy me Lemon ice cream and we forget about this?" Magnus looked up on him and chuckled nervously. "Okay."_  
"Lemon?" A. asked with a chuckle when Magnus handed him the ice cream, "that's my favourite." Magnus smiled. "I know." he whispered quietly. "How?" A. asked with slight frown. I don't know. Magnus realised. "It just fits to you." he said in the end and A. nodded, smiling.  
"Oh my god!" A. suddenly shouted as he distangled their hands and pointed on one of the buildings standing in front of them.  
"What?" Magnus asked, confused by the sudden change of A's behaviour. "We have to go!" A. shouted. "Where?" Magnus asked again, completely disoriented. _"Cinema!" Alec pointed on the building, "they are screening Skyfall!"_  
Magnus frowned, that movie was what, 6 years old? "It just got in the cinemas! We have to see it!" Alec shouted excitedly.  
"Aren't you confusing it with Spectre?" Magnus offered. "That's the newest James Bond movie, you know." _Alec frowned. "No. Skyfall is the latest one, I am sure."_  
_Magnus shook his head. "Google it, so we can agree I am right." "Sure," Alec chuckled, "here! See!" he laughed, showing Magnus his phone. "I was right!"_  
Magnus frowned, but followed A. in the building. "We want two tickets to the middle row please." Magnus told the woman behind the desk. He insisted on paying, so A. was the one to buy a popcorn.  
The cinema darkened as they entered the room. _Alec chuckled as Magnus took his hand carefully, leading them to their seats. 12L and 12M. First few minutes were only boring ads and trailers for another’s movies._  
_To Alec's surprise Magnus already managed to eat most of the popcorn. "You should stop eating so much." Alec whispered into Magnus' ear. "The salt will corrode your stomach."_  
_Magnus frowned and looked at him. "Where did you heard that?" he asked shocked._  
Magnus looked on A. as the adverts were running. He was eating popcorn, not even wanting to share it with Magnus. "You shouldn't eat too much of it," he whispered in A's ear, "the salt could corrode your stomach."  
A. frowned, looking on him, "My mom used to tell me that." Magnus nodded. I know. But how? _"Finally!" Alec cheered. "It's starting!" Magnus looked at him and smiled. Alec was so adorable, smiling._  
_"Oh no!" Alec shouted sometime through the movie, taking Magnus' hand. Or more like clutching it. It might hurt a bit, but Magnus didn't mind._ There was this typical James Bond femme fatale. As Bond was flirting with her, Magnus could feel A. to sigh in boredom.  
He chuckled and pushed in him by his shoulder. "Not your type?" he teased and A. leaned closer. _"No." Alec whispered, "I like tall, beautiful man with a lot of glitter."_  
_Magnus smiled. "Can I kiss you?" He asked, because he knew Alec wasn't much of PDA guy. The younger man looked on him, but didn't say anything. Instead he leaned closer to Magnus and closed the gap between them._  
Kissing A. was something Magnus would never get bored of. They didn't pay attention to the movie anymore. Magnus shifted a bit in his seat and leaned toward A., his hands taking A's jacket and dragging him closer.  
_They were making out for few minutes and they would happily carry on, but their friends had other plans. The redhead and blondie started throwing popcorn on them and the girl with dark long hair and  her boyfriend joined them until the lovers -finally- noticed it._  
_Alec groaned as he slightly pulled away from Magnus, meanwhile the other man took some of his and Alec's popcorn and started throwing it back on their friends. When they surrendered, Magnus turned back to Alec, brushed the rest of the popcorn out of his hair and smiled on him kindly, intertwining their fingers._  
_Magnus maybe couldn't see Alec due to the darkness, but he was sure he was blushing._  
"That was awesome!" A. shouted as they exited the cinema. "I mean, did you see how he took them all?" Magnus chuckled as he was holding A's hand. "Yes, I did, it was really fun." he agreed. A. was still smiling. "I enjoyed it, thank you."  
Magnus nodded. Both men were slowly walking toward the train station. Magnus was glad they were heading home, because he was tired, but on the other side, he really didn't want to say goodbye yet.  
As the train arrived in the station, both men walked in and sat to the seats next to each other, still holding hands. Magnus was quiet, looking out of the window. "Penny for your thoughts?" A. asked quietly and Magnus looked back on him.  
Magnus shook his head lightly. "Just thinking." he said quietly. "About what?" A. asked. "How lucky I am to meet you…" Magnus started, looking down on his hands.  
"But?" A. said understandingly, putting his hand on Magnus' arm. "But then why do I feel so sad? At one point I am so happy, but at the same time I feel so guilty. As if I hurt you and now I owe you, but I don't know how to do it."  
Magnus looked up on A. "Did I hurt you?" A. was looking on him with his big blue eyes. "No." he shook his head. "You have never intentionally hurt me."  
Magnus eyes widened. "And unintentionally?" he asked, scared of the answer.  
"Magnus, being with you is something I could never ever regret." Alec whispered, dragging him in tight hug.  
"Then why am I feeling like that?" Magnus cried, hiding his face in his hands.  
A's hand took Magnus's hands in his own and the other took Magnus' head, raising it, so Magnus was looking on him.  
"I am sorry all this is confusing." A. said quietly, "But I promise you, it will make sense, okay?" "What will make sense?" Magnus asked. "Everything," A. said and kissed Magnus, "Everything will."  
Before Magnus could say anything A. stood up and smiled on him. "It's your stop." he announced and Magnus looked out of the window. A. was right. "Right." he said as he gave A. one last peck on cheek, "See you tomorrow?" he asked and A. nodded.  
"Bye!" A. whispered, "Bye."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think, thanks so much for your feedback! Come for tomorrow update!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Station 3

It was sleepless night for Magnus. He was lying in the bed, very hardly trying to fell asleep, but as they say, the more you want to fell asleep, the harder it will be.  
Every few minutes Magnus managed to get some short sleep, but there were voices that always woke him up again.  
**~Mags, I know it's hard, I know you might want to stop fighting now he's gone, but you can't leave me here, you hear me?~**  
He woke up, shaking, even though it wasn't a nightmare. But it felt too real for it to be just a dream. What was happening?  
Magnus started dozing off again.  
**~Hey Magnus, it's me, I miss talking to you, please come back, okay?~**  
He stood up from the bed and walked in the kitchen to make himself a warm milk for better sleeping.  
**~Hi. It's me again, I just wanted to say sorry for the last time. It wasn't right from me to say those things. I love you Magnus, no matter which way you choose.~**  
He woke up again and looked on the clock.  
5 in the morning.  
Magnus sighed as he once again stood up from the bed, he wasn't going to fall asleep again.  
He took a long shower, put on his clothes and enjoyed a huge breakfast.  
Magnus walked on the train station and was there earlier than usually.  
Finally the train arrived, Magnus jumped in as soon as the door opened.  
A. was already sitting there, looking out of the window.  
"Morning." Magnus greeted A. as he sat in front of him, forcing a tired smile.  
"Magnus, hi!" A. smiled on him, "Oh, you look terrible." he chuckled.  
Magnus groaned as he sat on the seat.  
"Bad night?" A. asked and Magnus nodded.  
A. suddenly stood up and sat next to Magnus.  
"What are you doing?" Magnus asked quietly, looking up on A.  
"Try to get some sleep." A. whispered and Magnus put his head on A's shoulder. Soon he felt the sleep coming.  
Honestly Magnus haven't sleep that well in a long time. He probably should sleep more often on A.  
**~Hi Magnus, how are you? I miss your voice already, please come back.~**  
**~Hey Mags, something new? So remember that guy I liked? I don't think it's going to work... I am spending so much time thinking about you probably. Huh...~**  
**~So... It's me again... You are probably already tired of hearing me... Sorry... I just miss you... Come back okay?~**  
"Magnus." he suddenly heard, "Baby, wake up." quiet voice called him.  
Magnus opened his eyes and looked up on A.  
"Hi." A. smiled on him. "Hi." Magnus whispered, slowly waking up.  
"Where are we?" He asked quietly, still disoriented from the sleep.  
_"Look Magnus, I just wanted to thank you." Alec said shyly. "I just… everything you have done for me Magnus… thank you."_  
_"What are you talking about?" Magnus asked, as they exited the train on the sixth stop._  
_"I know I am not an easy person to be with, I am boring and.. But you stayed." Alec continued stuttering._  
_"You are adorable when you are nervous." Magnus chuckled, taking Alec's hand in his own._  
_"I love you Alexander. No matter what, okay?" He assured him._  
_The younger boy looked up on him. "You… you love me?" he asked unsurely._  
_Magnus stopped walking and took both of Alec's hands, looking straight in his eyes._  
_"Alexander, you are an amazing person and I love everything about you okay?" Magnus chuckled._  
_"Even your cute snores." he teased, Alec frowned. "I don't snore!" he murmured._  
_Magnus placed a small kiss on Alec's lips and smiled. "Oh you do darling."_  
"This is it." A. announced as they reached the building.  
Magnus frowned. "What is what?" "The restaurant, I hope you are hungry." A. smiled on him as they entered.  
Magnus looked outside. It got dark, already. It was evening. When did that happen?  "Magnus, you okay?" A. asked and the older man blinked few times before looking at him. "Yeah, sorry, blacked out for a while, what did you say?" Magnus asked.  
"I asked what you want to eat." A. repeated.  
_"What will you have?" Alec asked as they opened the menus._  
_"I am thinking about Lasagne." Magnus thought aloud, smiling on Alec, you?_  
_"I really don't know, I will probably take Spaghetti Bolognese." Alec frowned, still looking in the menu._  
_"How original." Magnus chuckled. "But no judgement here." he smiled on him kindly._  
"Did you like it?" A. looked at him with slight frown.  
"Mhm." Magnus nodded, "You truly chose a good restaurant darling." A. smiled. "Thanks." the younger man looked down on his hands. "What?" Magnus asked, but the other man wouldn't look at him. "What is it, dear?" Magnus carefully took A's hand. "Is everything alright?"  
_"I wanted to ask you something." Alec nervously spat out. "Of course, you can talk with me about anything Alexander, anything." Magnus reassured him. Alec finally looked up on him. "I was wondering…" Alec started. "Yes..?" Magnus helped him._  
_"I was just…. It's stupid, but I was wondering what we are?" Alec was looking straight in his eyes. "Oh Alexander." Magnus moved his chair so he was standing next to Alec. "It's not stupid, not at all." The younger man nodded._  
_"And to answer your question…" Magnus leaned closer to Alec, so he was whispering in his ear. "We are whatever you want us to be love." Magnus looked in his eyes as he slowly stroked Alec's cheek._  
_"Will you be my boyfriend then?" he whispered and Magnus smiled. "I would love to my dear." Magnus whispered, kissing Alec on the cheek. "That's all I get, boyfriend?" Alec teased as he leaned toward Magnus and kissed him on the lips._  
"I will pay!" A. argued as the waiter brought them a check.  
"Oh c'mon!" Magnus chuckled. "I am going to pay."  
But A. beat him to it, giving his credit card to the waitress.  
_"So what now?" Alec asked nervously. "The night is still young…"_  
_"We could go to a bar maybe?" Magnus offered carefully, knowing his boyfriend doesn't like to party much._  
_"…okay." Alec agreed in the end. "What's the worst thing that could happen?"_ _"A lot of things actually, alcohol poisoning, arresting, drugs,…" Magnus started to list the possibilities._  
_"Fuck you!" Alec shouted, shoving him off._ _"Gladly." Magnus whispered and Alec froze._ " _Just kidding baby, just kidding." he said, chuckling as he hugged Alec tightly._  
_"So here we are!" Magnus announced, pointing on the club._  
"Pandemonium?" A. frowned. "There's no way we are getting in, it's so exclusive!"  
But Magnus wasn't listening to him, he just took A's hand, and headed to the entrance.  
"Hi Raphael!" he greeted the man, who nodded on them and let them in.  
"What?" A. frowned and Magnus only laughed.  
"Just an advantage of being an owner." Magnus smirked on A.  
_"You are owner of a bar?!" Alec shouted as Magnus was laughing._  
_"What did you thought I am doing for living?" Magnus asked, handing Alec the drink._  
_Alec was too busy waving his hands in disbelief to take offered drink._  
_"I don't know?" he shouted confused, "Maybe something in fashion?" Magnus chuckled._  
_"I mean… look at yourself! You are always so style and pretty.." he pointed on his face._  
_"You are sweet." Magnus smiled as he hugged him and pressed a kiss on his cheek._  
_"Want to dance?" Magnus asked, taking Alec's hands and dragging him deeper in the room._  
_The younger man shook his head, chuckling nervously. "Magnus." he whined, "You know I can't dance!"_  
_"Everyone can dance Alexander, with the right amount of alcohol." he joked and Alec pushed him in the chest._  
_"I don't want alcohol poisoning!" Alec shriek, but Magnus only laughed._  
_"There's no such thing my dear." Magnus offered him the drink and Alec drunk it in one go._  
_"Whoah! Carefully there baby." Magnus chuckled, as he took the glass from Alec's hand and led him on the dancing parket._  
"I told you I am horrible dancer." A. complained but Magnus shook his head.  
His hand wandered on A's neck and dragged him down, closer to Magnus.  
"You are getting there." he whispered in his ear, before kissing him deeply.  
A's eyes widened as his hand roamed over Magnus' chest, finally taking the jacket and dragging him back in another kiss.  
_After few drinks Alec really started getting in the mood._  
_Not that Magnus wanted to somehow take advantage of his drunken state. Not at all._  
_He just wanted Alec to chill for while. He knew the younger men was always very serious. He deserved to have fun for once._  
_"I am really glad you took me here!" Alec shouted on him over the music and Magnus smiled._  
_"I am glad you are having fun!" he answered and Alec hugged him._  
_"I am always having fun with you Mags." he chuckled drunkily and Magnus frowned._  
_"Mags?" he teased and Alec rolled his eyes._  
_"You always call me Alexander…" he explained, "I want my own nickname for you as well." he whined and Magnus smiled._  
_"I am sure you will figure something out," he whispered in his hair. "But please not Mags."_  
_Alec looked up on him and frowned. "You better get used to it, I like it, Mags."_  
_His boyfriend shook his head. "But I don't Alexander." "Don't call me Alexander." Alec got angry and pulled away from Magnus._  
_"Noo, come back baby." Magnus whined as he reached for Alec. "Alec, baby, love, come back."_  
_The younger man rolled his eyes as he turned back to him. "You can't resist me." he chuckled._  
"No I can't." Magnus realized.  
"What?" A. shouted over the music, frowning.  
"I can't resist you." Magnus whispered. His head spinned and if it weren't for A. he would have fell on the floor.  
"I think you had too much to drink." A. said, "Let's get you home."  
_"I think you had too much to drink." Magnus said, as Alec fell in his arms, "Let's get you home."_  
_"I'm fine Mags." Alec whined, standing up, "Come on baby." He begged him, "We are leaving."_  
_"I don't want to be there alone." Alec cried. "You won't be, I will go with you, okay?" Magnus reassured him and the younger man nodded._  
_Magnus called them taxi and they drove to Alec's flat._  
As Magnus opened the door to his flat, he looked back on A. "Will you please stay?" He asked and A. frowned.  
"Just stay... Nothing more." Magnus specified and A. sighed. "Okay."  
_Magnus led Alec in the bed and pulled the cover over him._  
_"Goodnight sweetheart." He whispered as he pressed a small kiss on Alec's forehead._  
_"Please don't leave Mags." Alec whined and Magnus rolled his eyes on the nickname. But to be honest... He was getting used to it, not that he would ever admit it to Alec._  
"Will you stay?" Magnus asked again as A. helped him under the covers and turned off the lights.  
"Please, I don't want to sleep alone."  
A. sighed. "Okay, just until you fell asleep, okay?" He asked and Magnus nodded as the sleep slowly consumed him.  
**~Hey Magnus, it's already two weeks since we last talked. I miss you. Please come back.~**  
Magnus was already almost asleep when A. spoke up quietly.  
_"I love you too Mags." Alec whispered._  
At that moment Magnus realised one thing.  
Whenever he was with A. the world around them suddenly had colours.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think, thanks so much for your feedback! Come for tomorrow update!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Station 4

Magnus felt much better the next morning he woke up. Still as shit, but at least there were no weird dreams that night.  
As he slowly remembered what happened last evening he looked on the other side of the bed.  
It was nicely folded and clean. As if A. was never there.Magnus fell back in the bed and hid under the blanket.  
Fuck.  
He almost managed to fall asleep again, when his alarm clock started ringing. Magnus groaned, leaving the bed and going to get dressed. Everything took him longer then usually and the hungover wasn't helping.  
As he was sitting at the table and was eating his breakfast his eyes shot to the clock.  
Shit.  
He was late.  
Magnus took all his things and ran out of the flat, rushing on the train station. But he wasn't fast enough  
As he finally reached the station, his train was already leaving.  
"Shit!" Magnus shouted. "Shit." And he has no way to contact A. Stupid. He should have asked for his phone number. Or email at least.  
For now he had no other choice than to wait for the next train, which was coming in few minutes. He sighed when around ten minutes later the next train arrived. The doors opened and Magnus got in.  
He frowned. His seat was taken. By no one else than A.  
"Magnus! Hi!" A. chuckled. "How do you feel?" He asked.  
"Hungover." Magnus answered, still frowning.  
He missed the train, but yet, A. was still here.  
"I am sorry, I shouldn't have let you drunk so much." A. excused but Magnus shook his head.  
"I am adult, responsible for my own actions, even if it means having shitty hungover the next they." Both men laughed quietly.  
"Then you will appreciate that today we are going to museum, it's pretty quiet there." He reassured him and Magnus tilted his head on side.  
"How do you know if there's a museum?" He asked. "I thought you have never been there?"  
A. apparently didn't expect that questions and it took him few seconds before answering.  
"I read about it in newspapers." He said in the end and Magnus nodded.  
Whatever. He always had fun and felt safe with A. So there was no reason to worry.  
Or was there?  
The rest of the way they drove in silence. Magnus was sitting next to A. trying to get some more sleep, meanwhile A's hand was slowly brushing Magnus' hair.  
Just before the sixth stop A. carefully woke Magnus up and they exited the train.  
This time they got off in middle of very modern looking city. The tall towers were surrounding them from all sides.  
Glass offices, blinding adverts shining all over the streets, never ending rush on the streets.  
Magnus was looking up in awe.  
"This place is beautiful." Magnus sighed and A. standing next to him took Magnus' hand in his own and smiled on him. "Beauty it truly is."  
"So where are we headed?" Magnus asked as he looked on A.  
_"This way." Alec pointed in front of them. "Led the way." Magnus smiled as Alec dragged him through the streets._  
The weather seemed nice in the beginning but soon the dark clouds covered the blue sky and small drops started falling down.  
Only a seconds later both men became wet, running anywhere where they could hide before those drops.  
"Oh my god!" Magnus shouted as they finally reached the building, the art gallery. "I am completely soaked." he chuckled, smiling on A.  
"Me too." A. laughed, he reached for Magnus and dragged him closer, embracing him.  
"What are you doing?" Magnus laughed, ignoring the looks from other people.  
_"I need to share the body warmth." Alec smirked as he spinned them around in small circle._  
Magnus chuckled when they stopped spinning and leaned in, giving Alec a quick peck on his lips.  
"Shall we go inside?" A. asked and Magnus nodded.  
On their way inside they put their coats in the wardrobe and hand in hand entered the gallery.  
"Oh wow." Magnus breathed out looking around the room. All he paintings hanged on the walls were truly spectacular.  
_"This is amazing." Alec whispered, taking Magnus' hand and dragging him toward one of the paintings._  
"Do you see this beauty?" Alec chuckled, pointing on it. "This is the true art."  
"Oh," Magnus sighed, "and here I was thinking you like me…" he joked.  
A. looked back from the painting on Magnus.  
"Nah I just like you  for your money and innocence." He teased him and Magnus pretended to be hurt.  
_"I love you baby." Alec whispered as he linked their hands. "I love you too." Magnus smiled on him._  
Both of them then looked back on the painting.  
"What do you think of it?" Magnus asked A.  
"You don't want to know." the younger man chuckled.  
"Why?" Magnus frowned.  
"Because then I will just start overreacting and talk too much."  
_"I love listening to you Alexander." Magnus supported him as he lightly squeezed his hand._  
"I think it's amazing. How art can express so many feelings, emotions. I adore how the artist can just put all of his imagination on what used to be just a blank paper."  
Magnus was smiling on him, having no heart to interrupt him.  
"You see how little we need to make something so beautiful." He looked on Magnus who was looking on him with heart eyes.  
"Gosh I am so sorry Magnus," he suddenly gasped, "I didn't want to bore you."  
Magnus smiled on him, softly brushing his cheek. "You don't have to be sorry for something that makes you happy, not now, not ever, alright?" Alec smiled as he nodded.  
"Can we- would you mind-" Alec stuttered. "Not at all." Magnus offered him assuring smile. "Let's go."  
Holding hands they headed to the next room.  
A. told Magnus everything about the paintings. He seemed to be very interested in art and also educated. He told Magnus about it's painters, years, history and so on, Magnus loved it.  
"And what is this one?" Magnus finally stopped in front one of them. It seem familiar, Magnus surely saw it before.  
_"That," Alec chuckled, "is my favourite one."_  
That's how.  
_"It's called Hidden in Shadows." Alec said, "Painted by an unknown author in 1888."_  
"I like it." Magnus confessed.  
"He painted it at a hidden forest, or you could say so, because no one still knows where it is placed." He continued.  
"Can I ask you something?" Magnus suddenly interrupted him.  
A. stopped talking as he looked on Magnus. "Sure, what is it?"  
"Why is it this picture that you like the most?" Magnus asked and A. chuckled.  
He thought about it for while before answering.  
"I don't really know…" A. said. "Don't bullshit me, someone like you, you sure have a reason."  
_Alec chuckled nervously._  
"Because when I look at it, it reminds me that it's okay to hide, if it means that I can be truly myself then. That I am not the only one who was hiding." Alec spoke up quietly.  
Magnus frowned, not completely understanding what is the younger man talking about.  
"Here," he pointed on the painting, "everyone thinks this is just another painting, another landscape, but what they don't know is that the author was secretly homosexual."  
"Oh," Magnus looked closer. "There, behind the trees." Alec navigated him where he should look.  
And truly, Magnus found what he wasn't looking for. There, in the shadows were drawn two small almost invisible people.  
Men.  
Holding hands.  
"He used to ran in the forests to meet with his lover, but the whole relationship had to stay secret, otherwise they would have send them both in the asylum."  
"How do you know all this? I thought the author is unknown?" Magnus asked.  
"I don't," A. looked back on Magnus, "I made up the whole story." he confessed and Magnus scoffed.  
"But don't you find it too sad?" Magnus asked.  
_Alec sighed, avoiding Magnus' gaze._  
"When your parents are homophobic… you… then you don't have much more options if you want to be yourself…"  
"I am sorry." Magnus whispered, pulling A. in tight embrace.  
"Do you want to talk about it?" he offered, but A. shook his head. "I don't see them anymore, there's nothing to talk about."  
Magnus just nodded, not opening the conversation again, instead both men again turned their attention to the painting.  
"I can see why is this painting your favourite." Magnus confessed.  
"Do you really?" A. asked bit harshly. "What do you mean?" Magnus frowned, not understanding the suddenly change of mood.  
_"Everything is always so easy for you Magnus." Alec sighed. "I wish I could be more like you… your life is so much better than mine…"_  
Magnus scoffed ironically. "You have no idea what you are talking about."  
"Your family accepted you, your friends did, you are out and proud, you are so full of happiness, how do you manage that?"  
_Magnus shook his head. "Alexander… my mother died when I was just a child and my father… I haven't seen him for years…" Alec looked at him._  
_"Shit, Mag-" Alec wanted to start apologising, but Magnus didn't let him._  
_"I am not going to lie to you Alexander," he continued instead, "it's hard, fucking hard to be honest, but I don't give up, because there I people that care about me, and people I care about and together with them… it's worth fighting."_  
_Alec was looking on him quietly._  
_"Look I know you are scared Alec, but you have me, you are not alone anymore." Magnus took Alec's hands in his owns._  
_The younger man had tears in his eyes. "Did I- did I ever told you how much I love you?" he asked with trembling voice and Magnus chuckled._  
_"Not enough." he teased him and Alec dragged him in tight hug._  
"I love you." he whispered in his ear.  
"I love you too." Magnus smiled, pulling away from A.  
"How about you show me the rest of the pictures and we get out of here?" He offered and A. smiled. "Okay."  
As A. showed Magnus the rest of the gallery, neither of the man spoke again in the matter of their lifes, instead they focused on what they had now.  
The present.  
"You want some coffee?" A. offered as they were leaving the gallery.  
Outside was still raining.  
"Yeah, I would like that." Magnus chuckled softly. "It's freezing!" he complied.  
"It's not that bad." A. smiled on Magnus as he handed him his scarf.  
_"Don't do that." Magnus protested against taking the scarf. "You are going to be cold."_  
_"I don't mind." Alec chuckled, putting his hands in pockets. "I like cold."_  
_Magnus frowned. "You're weird." he joked as Alec pushed him away._  
_"Why do you like winter?" Magnus couldn't help but to ask._  
_"Because it's quiet." Alec smiled sadly. "The snow is everywhere and it's calming. I like the peace…"_  
_"What about you?" he asked and Magnus thought about it._  
_"I guess summer?" Alec scoffed._  
_"It's warm!" Magnus argued, "there's so much festivals and you can wear no clothes." he smirked on Alec._  
_The younger man chuckled nervously._  
_He was definitely blushing._  
After coffee and small walk around the city they started walking back to the train station.  
"I don't want to say goodbye just yet." Magnus whined.  
A. smiled on him kindly.  
"I will see you soon." he reminded him with a smile. "It's just few hours."  
Magnus nodded as he pressed a small kiss on A's lips and smiled goodbye.  
"Bye." he whispered.  
"See you soon." A. repeated, touching Magnus' cheek one last time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think, thanks so much for your feedback! Come for tomorrow update!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Station 5

Magnus' nights were getting worse. He couldn't sleep. The voices wouldn't let him. But every time he woke up, he couldn't remember what they said.  
The only thing he knew, was that he was sad. Sadder every time he woke up. Sadder every other stop they got off on.  
He was ashamed to look on A. and had no idea why. But he tried to make sure A. was happy. Magnus felt like he owned him that. That much at least.  
But here was one thing he remembered from his dreams, from the moments he zoned out when he was with A., and that was that Magnus felt happy.  
That Magnus saw colours again.  
Magnus sighed as he got on the train. He can't go on much longer like that. "Good morning Magnus." A. greeted him with smile as Magnus fell in the seat.  
"Hmornin'." Magnus mumbled as he pressed his head to the window. "Are you alright, Mags?" A. asked and Magnus frowned.  
"I told you to not call me that." he groaned. No I didn't. Wait… I did… but when? Why? He never called me Mags before… "Magnus? What's wrong?" A. asked him again, when Magnus zoned out.  
"I am losing my mind." Magnus cried, hiding his face in his hands. The silent tears were streaming down his face, the drops falling on the floor.  
"Oh." A. gasped. "No… No! Magnus, you are not losing your mind." he rushed to sit next to him. He hugged him tightly, as he pressed small kiss in his hair. Magnus melted in the touch immediately. I am crazy. Magnus thought.  
"You are not crazy." A. assured him, softly brushing Magnus hair. They were driving few minutes in silence, enjoying each others closeness. Magnus' thoughts were going fast. Everything started the day he saw A. for the first time.  
Together with him he saw colours again. He started having all these deja vu feeling. And the feeling of shame. All the guilty. But at the same time, he was sometimes feeling so happy. Free.  
He felt loved and he loved.  
Suddenly A. spoke up and so disturbed Magnus from his thoughts. "I know it's a lot to take Magnus." he whispered in his ear, still playing with his disobedient curls. "I know you are confused, but I promise it all will make sense soon." Magnus frowned.  
"What are you talking about?" he asked quietly, looking up on A. "Do you trust me?" A. asked. Magnus nodded. "I don't know why, but I do… what's happening to me A?" "I promise it will all make sense, okay Magnus?" A. said, "I just need you to trust me."  
"Why?" Magnus cried, "Just tell me what's going on. Who are you? What do you want from me?" "I can't tell you that." A. sighed. "What?" Magnus frowned. "But you have to- I mean- what-" "Magnus. Mags. Listen to me." A. pulled away from him so he could look at him. "Calm down. Remember what I said?" Magnus was crying quietly as he shook his head. "You said a lot today, which one thing you mean?" A. chuckled, "There's only one thing that matters the most." He said, looking straight in Magnus' eyes.  
"Do you trust me?" he asked.  
Magnus thought about it. Actually there was nothing to think about. He knew he does. But all of it is just too fast. He knew A. for barely a week. "I do." he said in the end and A. smiled. "Then let's go." "Where?" Magnus asked.  
"There are still few places I need you to see."  
Magnus frowned. "I thought you have never been there." "I was. We both were." Magnus shook his head. "No." he whispered, "I haven't." A. sighed. "There are still many things you need to understand Magnus. Places you have to see, people you have to meet."  
"You are young Magnus. Your whole life is just starting." Just as Magnus wanted to say something, A. jumped out of his seat. "Come on darling, just trust me." he said as he held his hand toward Magnus.  
When they got off the next station. The eighth one. Fifth one since Magnus' stop. They weren't in city anymore. Magnus still wasn't sure how this was working, because the stations looked different from inside, compared when they actually got off on them.  
It always seemed there was this one place, where they were dragged to. The one place, that felt familiar and yet mysterious. This time, they got off the train and appeared in small park. Magnus calmed down a bit, feeling calmer just by standing there, but… Magnus wanted to start complaining but A. interrupted him just by look.  
Trust me. His eyes screamed. Magnus sighed as A. took his hand and offered him a smile. "Just enjoy it Mags." he said quietly. "I thought I asked you to stop calling me that." he murmured.  
_Alec laughed and gosh, Magnus loved that sound. "And I told you that if you can call me Alexander, then I want to call you Mags!"_  
It was happening again.  
"Magnus stop thinking about it!" A. sighed as he stopped walking and stood in front of him, so they were facing each other. "I promised that you would understand, so now trust me and everything will be alright."  
Magnus nodded, taking a deep breath. As soon as he calmed down, he felt the familiar warmth of the dreams coming.  
One part of him wanted to fight it, but the other part trusted A.  
_"So what are we doing here?" Magnus asked. Alec smiled on him as he intertwined their hands. "I just really like this place, do you remember when we first met?" he asked and Magnus chuckled. "Oh I do, don't think I will ever forget." "I was there with Cat and Ragnor, we celebrated his promotion." Magnus smiled at that memory._  
_"Yeah, and I was there with my siblings, Izzy and Jace." Alec added. "They wanted to party, but Izzy made me come." Both of them were smiling on each other. "I saw you immediately." Magnus confessed, "you were so shy." Magnus laughed. "Standing there in the corner, wishing you've had never come." Alec rolled his eyes. "Come on I wasn't that bad." he groaned. Magnus stood and pulled him in hug._  
_"You were." he whispered in his ear. "You begged me to get you out of there. You wanted me just for yourself, didn't you?" he teased him. Alec pulled away from Magnus. "Stop it!" he shouted, pushing him away. "I just asked if you wanted to go somewhere quieter."_  
_"You wanted me for yourself, just admit it baby." Magnus continued teasing his boyfriend. Alec pulled him in kiss. "Maybe I did." he said between the kisses. "Maybe next time you could be more… forward?" Magnus offered. "You know… I was so confused, until the New Year party." "Our first kiss." Alec whispered, smiling shyly. "But I liked you, I just wasn't sure… what to do." Magnus chuckled as they started walking again._  
_"But I fell in love with you so easily." Magnus confessed. "I love you." "I love you too." Alec smiled. "So thank you for not giving up." "Oh, I could never." Magnus smiled, dragging him in another hug and kissing him._  
_"Actually Magnus?" Alec suddenly stopped walking, "There is something I would like to…" he stuttered. "I uh.. Shit.." he started hyperventilating a bit._  
_"Alexander, calm down." Magnus whispered, "Just breathe." Alec nodded._ _Magnus' heart was beating so quickly he was scared it would jump out of his body._  
"Magnus?" A. asked and Magnus looked up on him. "My heart is beating so fast." he complied, "Am I dying?" A. chuckled, "No, no you are not."  
_When Alec calmed down, he smiled on  Magnus. "Okay." he whispered, "Okay."_ _"I love you Alexander." Magnus smiled on him. "I love you too Mags." Magnus rolled his eyes at the nickname, but didn't say anything._  
_What Alec did next took Magnus' breath away._  
_His beautiful boyfriend suddenly kneeled in front of him and with a shy smile took a small box in his hands, opening it._ _Inside was a small ring, which was shining so beautifully, that Magnus started tearing._  
_"I know I am this stupid man, who is shy and unable to flirt, but you opened something in me. I love you with all my heart Magnus, so will you do me a honor?"_  
_"Magnus Bane, will you marry me?" he asked and Magnus chuckled, tears streaming down his face._  
Magnus started laughing. A. looked at him with frown. "Are you okay Magnus?" he asked and the older man nodded.  
"I just… I don't know… this is funny…" A. frowned. "I have no idea what's happening." That made Magnus laugh even more. "Me neither." he confessed.  
_"Magnus?" Alec asked nervously as he stood up, "I am sorry? Was it bad id-"_  
_"No!" Magnus shouted as he stopped laughing, "sorry," he excused, "I love you Alexander, I just told you and I am telling you again and again."_  
_"Then why-?" he asked nervously._  
_"Because," Magnus smiled on Alec as he pulled something out of his pocket, "I love you more than I could even imagine was possible," he kneeled in front of Alec._  
_"If you could just wait for ten minutes, I swear I would be the first one to propose to you." he said, still smiling. "So Alexander Lightwood, you stole my heart, how about I steal your name?" he chuckled. "Will you marry me?" he finally asked._  
_"Yes!" Alec chucked, tears in his eyes. "That was horrible proposal." he teased as he leaned closer to Magnus and kissed him._ _"But you loved it." Magnus whispered between the kisses. "I did."_  
_"I will marry you too, just to make it clear." Magnus chuckled._  
_"I love you fiancee." Alec whispered. "I love you too my ex-boyfriend." Magnus kissed him again._ " _Oh shut up." Alec chuckled. "I want an early divorce." he laughed._  
_"Noo baby, I am sorry, please come back!" he called after Alec, who started walking away. He ran to him and pressed him against the near tree, kissing him deeply._  
Magnus started humming some song, he knew not sure from where.  
Why was he suddenly so happy?  
He looked on A. who was quietly walking next to him. "I love you so much." he whispered and A. looked on him.  
"What?" he asked quietly. "I said I love you." Magnus repeated and pressed against him, kissing him.  
"I love you too." A. smiled in the kiss. "I always will, don't you ever forget that."  
"I love you and I really want you, but let's not do this here." Magnus said, slightly pulling away from A.  
A. chuckled, "I know just the right place." he announced, took Magnus' hand and started walking back to the houses.  
_Magnus wasn't sure how they managed to get to their flat without dying, but here they were._  
_As soon as they closed the door, Alec pressed Magnus against it, already working on the buttons of his shirt._  
_"Someone's eager." Magnus chuckled in the kiss. "Says the one who's pressing me against the door." he responded and Alec scoffed._  
Slowly they moved in the bedroom, leaving all the clothes around the flat.  
They were in no rush. After all, they were engaged and to be each other for the rest of their lifes. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any ideas what's happening?


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Station 6

Magnus sighed as he woke up in his bed. For a second he was confused where he was.  
Hadn't yesterday happen? He slowly remembered what happened.  
He. Had. Sex. With. A. wait… did he or not? He doesn't remember going back afterwards.  
He groaned, shouting in his pillow. Why is this happening to him?  
What are these dreams? And why can't he remember them?  
Magnus was sure it had something to do with A. but what?  
He has to find out.  
Their time was running out. Magnus wasn't sure how he knew that, but the closer they got to the eleventh stop, Magnus could feel himself worrying. Being scared. Not ready to say goodbye.  
As he got in the train, he headed to his seat, where A. was already sitting.  
"Good morning." he smiled as he sat.  
"Good morning." A. offered him another of his beautiful smiles.  
"Slept well?" he asked and Magnus nodded.  
"I uh.." he chuckled nervously, "about yesterday…" Was it just a dream? Or did it really happen?  
"Yeah, it was lovely." A. said with smile. "So it wasn't dream?" Magnus asked unsurely.  
"No." A. laughed. "But I woke up home… I was in my flat… I don't remember going home."  
A. chuckled, but never answered his question.  
"So what is it today?" he asked, he realized, that maybe he shouldn't worry too much about the things that were happening. After all, A. would be gone soon and Magnus wanted to enjoy as much time with him as he could.  
"The next stop?" A. asked, but Magnus scoffed, "Don't play games with me, I know you already know where we are going." A. frowned, but Magnus was looking straight at him.  
He sighed. "A planetarium." A. said in the end and Magnus raised his eyebrows. "A planetarium?" he asked. "Yeah."  
"I have never been in one." he confessed. "I know." A. smiled on Magnus. But how? Magnus wondered, but in the end he hadn't ask him.  
It didn't matter to him after all. Because as long as he was with A. he knew everything was alright. That he was happy.  
They walked through small alley of trees until they reached the enormous, round building with a huge telescope coming out through the roof.  
_"This is amazing." Magnus gasped. "It's so big." Alec snorted. "What?" Magnus asked, confused, "why are you laughing?"_  
"You are cute," Alec whispered, "you are always so… experienced… you know everything, have been everywhere… it's cute to watch you to experience something for the first time." he grinned on his fiancee.  
"How long have you been planning this?" Magnus asked with a smile. Alec only shrugged, smiling mysteriously. "Who knows?"  
They entered the building and Alec insisted on paying for the tickets, since it was his idea, Magnus was anyway too busy looking around the room.  
"Let the tour begin." Alec joked as they walked in.  
"It's called Hubble eXtreme Deep Field," A. said, pointing on the screen in front of them, "they released that picture in 2012, 25th September."  
_Alec chuckled for himself, "You can see there the pictures of the oldest galaxies and farthest-away galaxies," Magnus looked up on his fiancee, he loved listening to him to talk about his interests._  
"The farthest-away galaxies are 13.2 billion light-years from Earth… which is pretty cool when you think about it. It's like looking in the history." A. looked on the left and pointed on the another screen,  
"There you can see an interesting video, that's what I am talking about." The older man moved a little bit as both of them sat on the bench, so he got better view on the video A. was talking about,  
"People always think how huge world is, but it actually isn't… Earth is so ridiculously small. Compare Earth to the biggest planet in our solar system- Jupiter… Earth is only the fifth largest planet in our solar system…  
And now compare it to Sun… the Earth looks just like a tiny ant next to it… pretty wild isn't it? But that's not all! Now let's compare Sun to the other stars! Sun is small, comparing it for example to Sirius… it's nothing…"  
A. paused for while, "And yet here we are. Humans. On our small planet. It can seem lonely. But I guess it's still better than to be attacked by aliens, right?" he chuckled. "Come on," A. said as he stood up, "I will show you more."  
"Ever heard about Lajka?" he asked, not even expecting the other man to response, " people wrongly say she was the first animal sent in the universe… but there were many animals before her.  
For example the really first animals to be sent in universe were just some insects, such as drosophila. They also sent a monkey… but Lajka… she was a Russian stray dog… they trained her for a long time, but during the start it just was probably too much and just few hours after she left the land she died, on over heat…"  
A. paused, looking on the pictures on the walls, "she was a beautiful dog. People do crazy things in name of science…" he moved to the next picture. "People can think it's weird to care that much about some stray dog…  
_But I just… don't want her to be forgotten…" he stuttered, "we had the same kind of dog at home you know?" he chuckled, "I persuaded my parents to call her Lajka." Alec smiled a little bit._  
In the next room Alec explained to Magnus the mission on Mars. The Curiosity and explained that before things were as in the movie 'The Martian' the humankind has a long way to go.  
Magnus listened to him, not saying anything but paying attention. He nodded sometimes.  
  
_When they finally -for Magnus- left the planetarium, they headed on dinner, Magnus insisted on paying for._  
As both men ordered their foods, hey started talking. Magnus loved, how easy it was to talk with Alec. The younger man was always very understanding, he never judged and that was just another thing Magnus' loved about his fiancee.  
"Have you ever thought about what is going to be?" Alec asked as Magnus chuckled. Oh, this man and his psychological questions… he always liked to overthink things even though Magnus told him many times to not do so.  
"You mean… our future?" Magnus asked with smile. Alec put his hand on Magnus' and Magnus put his other one over Alec's.  
"Yes." Alec confirmed. "Hm," Magnus hummed, "I always wanted a lot of kids…" he started, Alec carefully listening to him,  
"about seven… wait exactly seven, their names would be Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday, so every each of them would have one day, and this day they would work for me."  
"You know, like cleaning around the house, making dinner, washing clothes." Something landed on him, Alec was chuckling.  
"Can you stop?" Magnus laughed quietly, but A. shook his head. "Stop what?" he pretended to not understand what's going on. Then he did it again. He took a piece of bread and throw it on Magnus.  
"Why do you keep throwing bread on me?" he whisper-shouted. "Poor kids!" A. gasped. "Seriously Magnus? Kids slaves?" he shook his head, still smiling.  
Magnus looked around them and saw people looking at him. "Everyone is looking at us." he complied. "No," A. quieted, "they are looking at you."  
_"But for real Magnus?" Alec asked, "c'mon, tell me." Magnus chuckled nervously. He didn't really think about it before. "I am sorry," he said in the end, "I have no idea, I never thought about it. But I guess… two are fine?" Alec nodded._  
"And how about you, how many children do you want?" Magnus asked.  
Alec smiled. "Two or three," he said quietly, "two boys and little girl as well, you know… for her big brothers." Magnus understood. "That's truly beautiful idea darling." he whispered.  
“I can’t wait to marry you.” Alec smiled and Magnus took his hand in his own. “Me neither.” He whispered, “Which reminds me, that your family still doesn’t know.” Alec shrugged. “Maybe we should just ran away and get married somewhere in secret. Just the two of us.” Magnus raised his eyebrows. “But I always wanted huge wedding.” He gasped. “Well we who said we can’t have both?” Alec joked.  
“Okay.” Magnus breathed out. “Let’s do it.” A. frowned. “You know I was kidding right?” he asked, but Magnus shook his head. “It doesn’t matter, let’s do this.” He said as he paid for the dinner, took A’s hand and dragged him out of the restaurant.  
_“Where are we going?” Alec shouted as Magnus was dragging him through the city._  
Magnus suddenly realised they weren’t in their city anymore. He heard seagulls, and waves crushing onto the shore. It was much warmer outside, both men dressed only in shorts and t-shirts. Magnus looked on A. with frown. “Holiday.” A. Explained. “France.” Magnus smiled.  
_“We are getting married.” Magnus announced. “Tonight!” Alec chuckled as he dragged Magnus to himself and kissed him. “I can’t wait!” he whispered. They ran into the closest church, breathing hard, but with smiles on their faces._  
_“Do you Alec Lightwood take this man as your lawful husband to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and cherish until death do you part?” Alec looked on Magnus and smiled. “I do.” He whispered happily._  
_“And do you Magnus Bane take this man as your lawful husband to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and cherish until death do you part?”_  
Magnus looked on A. And smiled, tears streaming down his face as he nodded. A. Probably knew what was happening, because he smiled back on him and pressed his hand.  
_“I do.” Magnus said, holding Alec’s hands. “With that I now pronounce you husband and husband.” The priest said, “You may kiss now.”_  
_Both men chuckled, as they leaned closer, kissing deeply. Since they were the only one on the ceremony they could do whatever they wanted. When they finally parted few seconds later, they stayed close, their foreheads touching._  
_“How about we get out from here husband,” Magnus offered, “and we celebrate this the right way.” Alec chuckled. “Lets go Bane-Lightwood.” Alec smiled as they intertwined their hands and headed out of the church._  
_“Isabelle is going to kill us when she finds out.” Alec said and Magnus nodded. “ It was worth it.” He said with teasing smile. “Oh it was.” Alec laughed._  
Magnus didn’t realize he was crying until A. Started brushing his tears away. “I am sorry,” Magnus excused, “I am so sorry.” A. Only smiled on him. “It’s alright Magnus.” He whispered, pulling him in tight hug. “I don’t regret anything with you.” He said, brushing his hair.  
“I...uh... I think I should go.” Magnus suddenly stuttered. A. Probably realized it was for the best and he nodded. “I am sorry.” Magnus whispered, pulling away from him, and slowly headed back, where he thought the train station was.  
A. Had no right to do this. He couldn’t make Magnus feel happy and then crush him on the ground. Magnus couldn’t do it anymore. Tomorrow he’s going to work. No matter what anyone says.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Station 7

Magnus woke up about hour before his alarm clock even ringed. He sighed as he sat up in his bed and looked out of the window.  
There was no use to try and fell asleep again, so Magnus got up from the bed and walked in the kitchen to make himself a breakfast.  
When he walked on the earlier train that morning, the sun was just going out.  
Magnus wasn’t sure what exactly he was trying to achieve. Avoid A.? After all he had never done anything to him, maybe only just made him feel happy, so he should be glad, right?  
But then, why wasn’t he? Why was he feeling sad? Guilty? Why was he scared to face A.? What was the shame? Magnus wondered what happened between them. Did he hurt A.?  
As he sat in the train, he sighed. A. Wasn’t here. Of course he wasn’t. Magnus took earlier train just to avoid him.  
He looked on the empty seats and frowned. For a second he hesitated if it was good idea to avoid A. After all... They had last three stops.  
He didn’t think much about it as he sat on the seat where A. Always sat. He sniffed as he looked out of the window, thinking about everything that happened in the last week.  
He was almost on then next stop since his station when he heard the train toilet flush. Magnus was still looking out of the window, when he smelled known smell.  
He knew from where, just at the moment when

He looked up, he heard a familiar voice, “You are sitting on my seat.”  
It was A. Magnus chuckled on A's choice of the words. He said exactly those words to him when they first met.  
“What are you doing here?” Magnus gasped as A. sat in front of him. The younger man sighed. “Magnus please.” He whispered.  
“I am done.” Magnus said, as he looked out of the window. “No you're not.” A. said, “We still have one more station.” Magnus looked on him.  
“Three.” he corrected him. “See?” A. chuckled. “You’re not done.” He smiled on Magnus as the older man growled.  
“What do you want from me?” he asked, frowning. A. looked on him and kept staring on him.  
“I am just fulfilling my promise.” A. Said sadly and Magnus suddenly felt bad again. “What promise?” he asked with tears in his eyes.  
The other man sighed. “Magnus I can’t talk about it.” He whispered quietly and Magnus rolled his eyes. “You never tell me anything.” Magnus hissed. “Don’t you think it’s finally time?”  
“Magnus...” A. sighed, “I really can’t... It doesn’t work like that.” Magnus frowned. “Leave me alone.” He growled as he crossed his arms and looked out of the window.  
“I can’t.” A. sighed, “Why?!” Magnus raised his voice, not caring who heard him. “Because I care about you! Because I love you!” A. said calmly, which made Magnus even angrier.  
“Can we talk about this outside?” A. begged, “Get off on this station, please Magnus.” The younger man was looking on him with big sad eyes. Magnus just couldn’t say no.  
“Fine.” He hissed in the end as he stood up and walked to the door, A. following him. “So what is it going to be today?” he murmured and A. looked at him.  
“Nothing.” He said, “I promise. We will just talk.” Magnus refused to look on his lover. Or ex-lover. Whatever they were. Or weren’t.  
The train stopped on the tenth stop and both men walked out, stepping on the muddy ground. “Where are we?” Magnus couldn’t help but to ask. His curiosity wouldn’t let him to not to ask.  
A. frowned a bit, before looking away from Magnus. “Just some park.” He said, but Magnus knew he was lying. He could see it.  
“Don’t lie to me.” Magnus said, “I know when you’re lying and it seems you’re not doing anything else lately.” A. sighed. “This is the park where we first met.” He whispered quietly, looking on the benches in front of them.  
Magnus looked in the younger man, frowning. “But we met in the tr-“ A. looked on him with such sadness in his eyes and Magnus understood. “We have met before, right?” he asked, scared of the answer.  
“Yeah,” A. whispered, “we did.” Magnus couldn’t be angry at the moment, seeing how hurt A. looked. It must have hurt. But what happened?  
Magnus followed A. who walked toward the benches, not caring if Magnus decided to follow him or not. He had really long legs, Magnus was almost jogging next to him.  
“Tell me about it.” He asked as they sat down on one of the benches. A. Looked on him with small smile, then he looked back in front of him.  
“It was few years ago.” He began, “I came together with my siblings. Izzy and Jace. You were there with your friends Catarina and Ragnor.” Magnus was looking on him, trying to remember, but couldn't, no matter how hard he tried. “I wasn’t, I really was never much of party guy, unlike you.” A. chuckled.  
“I saw you the second you arrived.” A. confessed and chuckled at that memory, “You were that beautiful guy, dancing in middle of the crowd, but I saw only you.” Magnus wasn’t sure how, but he felt himself blushing.  
“And honestly, we spent like hour just eye fucking, because I was too shy to approach you and you were to busy seducing me by dancing.” Magnus laughed quietly, tears of joy in his eyes. “When you finally stopped dancing, you walked to the bar, where I was sitting, unable to tear my eyes away from you.”  
The younger man paused for while, looking on Magnus and down on his hands, chuckling nervously.  
“You saw I had nothing to drink, so you bought me a beer.” A. continued few minutes later, “You said I looked like a beer kind of a man.” Magnus felt a single tear to fall from his eye. “I hated the beer, but I drank it, because you bought it.” A. confessed quietly, with light smile.  
“We started talking and you kept convincing me to go dancing with you, I refused, of course, I can’t dance, and I couldn’t get embarrassed in front of you.” The man quickly looked on Magnus, “So instead I asked you, if we could go somewhere more quieter... But I think I just wanted you for myself, all those girls around us, looking on you...” Magnus laughed. “I bet they were looking at you.”  
A. shook his head, smiling and Magnus was glad he managed to make him smile at least once.  
“So we headed up here, right on this bench,” he pointed on the place where they were sitting, “and we got talking here. You brought a bottle of wine and stole, or as you said, borrowed a wine glasses from the bar and you poured us one together glass.” A. smiled, secretly wiping of the tears.  
“I was so nervous in the beginning, to talk with you, because you were so nice and I was scared I would fucked it up.” Magnus shook his head, smiling kindly. “But after few glasses I started talking as well, and it was really nice. It was fun.”  
He took deep breath. “Before you, I was just this shy guy, hidden in the shadows of his siblings, but with you, you made me feel important.”

Magnus cried a bit, unable to hide his tears before the other man, who was fortunately too focused on the memories. “We talked about everything, about our families, I told you how I was fighting with my parents, and in return you told me some fun stories about your life. And you had many of those.” A. smiled.

“And when we didn’t talk, we would just sit on the bench and listening to the music playing below us.” A. thought for a second, lost in his thoughts. “You were sitting so close to me, I could feel the warmth of your body,” the man continued, “I was feeling like on fire, and when you finally took my hand, I felt the butterflies in my stomach.” A. chuckled. “I looked on you, but you wouldn’t look on me, you were just smiling and holding my hand.”

He dried his tears, when he finally dared to look on Magnus. “I miss you so much.” Magnus heard himself to whisper. “I know.” A. looked on him with sad smile as he leaned closer to him and brushed his cheek softly. “I know you do.” “What happened?” Magnus cried softly. “I am sorry.” A. whispered, not answering his question. “I am so sorry I wasn't strong enough.”

Magnus lied on A’s lap, meanwhile the other man slowly brushed his hair. “You know, we were talking so long, that we were still sitting on the bench when the sun came out.” he continued telling Magnus about their first meeting. “I was so tired, so I lied on your lap as you do now and you were brushing my hair softly. I was little afraid that you would be gone, but when I woke up, you were still sitting there, sleeping.”

Magnus smiled as he tried to imagine it. “Suddenly the world seemed like much better place.” A. smiled. “You asked me out on a date, and I couldn’t be happier.” he paused.”The New Year party.” Magnus whispered, looking up on A. who nodded.

“I am sorry I don’t remember any of this.” Magnus spoke up so quietly that only A. could hear him, “I am sorry I don’t remember you.” Alec shook his head lightly. “I’m sorry it takes me so long.”

Both men were sitting there in silence. There was nothing that could ease the pain Magnus was feeling.

“So what are you exactly? Or who?” Magnus asked after few minutes of silence. A. looked on him. “I am here to help you.” He avoided the question. “When we met you said you had more important job. What was it?” A. moved his attention toward the birds chirping in front of them, when he looked back on Magnus, he sighed. “I need you to remember.”

“Remember what?” Magnus asked as he sat next to A. “Everything.” Magnus frowned.

“Am I dead?” He asked. “Are you my guardian angel?” A. laughed. “No and no.” He smiled kindly on Magnus. “You're alive.” “So this isn't just a dream?” A. looked away.

“This pain I feel…” Magnus began, “All the guilt…” Magnus looked on A. with tears in his eyes. “What happened? Have I done something bad?” He asked, scared of the answers, “Did I hurt you?”

The younger man refused to look on him. “Do you hate me?” Magnus finally asked and that question made the other man to look back on him. “No!” He said quickly, “I don't hate you. I never did Magnus. I love you, don't you ever forget that!”

“Did I hurt you?” Magnus asked again, very seriously. “Did I?” He almost shouted when he got no answer. “No.” A. whispered, “it wasn't your fault.”

The younger man suddenly stood up and took Magnus’ hand. “Where are we going?” He asked. “It's late.” A. announced, “you should probably head home soon.” Magnus sighed, but A. was right. It was already getting dark outside.

“I don't want to leave just yet.” Magnus sighed. “I need more time.” He cried. “I need more time with you.” A. hugged him tightly. “I know. I am sorry.” He whispered, kissing him lightly in the hair.

“It's okay, you will be okay.” A. whispered. He linked their hands and they started walking toward the train stop.

They could see the train in distance, how it was slowly approaching the station. Magnus tightened his grip on A’s hand. He was not ready to go.

“I love you Magnus.” A. said as his hand touched Magnus’ cheek and brushed it softly. “Don't you ever forget that.” Magnus blinked away the tears and leaned closer to A., kissing him on the lips carefully. “I love you more Alexander.” He tried to joke, but failed miserably. “Impossible.” The younger man tried chuckled.

Magnus got on the train and watch A. until he disappeared from his view. Only then he realised what happened.

He called him Alexander.

Suddenly everything started making sense.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahahaha shit goes down


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Station 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are almost there!

Magnus woke up after dreamless night. The second he opened his eyes, he knew something was wrong. Very very wrong. For starters, he couldn't see colours anymore. Again. He sighed as he pulled the pillow over his head and groaned loudly.

He remembered what the other man said yesterday. How he called him Alexander… everything started making sense. He didn't know how, but the feeling was there.

Magnus got up from the bed and headed to the kitchen, making himself the most simple breakfast man could imagine. After eating it, he headed on the train station. He noticed that the flowers were blossoming into many shapes and probably colours as well. He took few of them, putting them in one big flower. He will give it to Alexander.

The train arrived and Magnus got on, slowly walking toward his seat. He felt his chest clasping. There was this feeling inside him, telling him that nothing is going to be the same again.

He wasn't there. Magnus sighed as he sat. The tears were coming to his eyes. Magnus tried to push them away, not understanding why he was feeling so sad. A. wasn't gone, was he? He just couldn't come, or something happened… but he will see him again, right?

The train was passing station by station and Magnus was looking out of the window, trying to remember. It was all there, he was sure of that, now he just needed to find out how to remember it.

The closer to the eleventh stop they were coming, the more nervous, the more terrified he felt. Something bad was going to happen and he couldn't stop it.

The train started slowly stopping down and Magnus felt his hands shaking. He took a deep breath, held the flower in his hand tighter. This was it. The train door opened and Magnus got off.

When he looked around he thought it was just another park, that was until he looked closer and realized that it was something much more different.

His legs were going on their own will, knowing the way and Magnus just kept waking wherever it was leading him. He opened the small gate and entered the property.

He kept walking on the small path, looking around himself he saw the old and long forgotten tombstones. Most of them disappearing under the many layers of grass and actuation of long years. Just a very few of them were clean and clearly seen. Mostly the new ones, where the pain was still long-standing.

After few minutes of walking Magnus was finally standing in front of the end of his road. His legs stopped walking and stood in front of small gravestone. Magnus read what stood there.

 

_Alexander Gideon Lightwood_

_1989-2018_

_A husband, brother and friend_

 

Magnus felt the tears coming to his eyes. “Alexander…” he whispered, putting the flower before the grave, just as he felt on the ground crying.

 

 _I don't know where I'm going_  
_But I sure know where I've been_  
_Hanging on the promises_ _  
_ In songs of yesterday.”

 _Alec chuckled as he joined Magnus._  
_“And I've made up my mind, I ain't wasting no more time. Here I go again. Here I go again” the sang as they drove through the land._  
It was just few days after their unofficial secret wedding, after they told their families and siblings that they were officially married, they decided to go on their honeymoon just before having the second, official wedding with all of them.

_Magnus suggested somewhere warm, like the coast, meanwhile Alec found it boring. In the end they agreed on road trip. It wasn't boring and they could reach the coast as well._

_They had one week behind them and one more to go. Magnus was excited because they just reached the coast and already planned what all beaches they had to see. After Alec intentionally navigated him wrong and so caused that Magnus didn't get to see the amazing beach he always wanted to, he decided it was the best for them, that Alec will be driving and Magnus navigating him. (Of course they continued their trip only after whole day, when Magnus refused talking to his husband)_

_After few days they were leaving the coast and heading more midland. Only then Magnus volunteered to drive again and Alec let him, because as he said 'his husband looks really hot when driving’._

_That's how they got here. The sun was slowly falling down, both men only in t-shirts and shorts, sunglasses and smiling on each other, signing. Magnus was driving, one hand on wheel, the other on the stick shift. At some point of the drive, Alec put his hand over Magnus’ on the stick and intertwined their fingers._

_“Though I keep searching for an answer, I never seem to find what I'm looking for. Oh, Lord, I pray You give me strength to carry on…” Magnus was singing and Alec was looking on him with heart eyes._ _  
_ _The song slowly ended and Magnus looked on Alec with wide smile. “What?” He asked, slightly blushing. “You're horrible singer.” Alec joked and Magnus pretended to be hurt. “I love your singing.” Alec whispered, giving Magnus a quick peck and Magnus lightly squeezed his hand._

_“And here I thought you love me for who I am.” Alec chuckled, dis intertwining their hands as he brushed Magnus cheek. “You're pretty nice.” Alec whispered. “You're pretty clever.” Magnus whispered back with a wink._

_“I love you.” Alec said as he leaned closer to Magnus and kissed him. “I love you more.” Magnus teased as he kissed him back and focused back on the driving._

_Suddenly there appeared a car in front of them, overtaking the car before itself, and so driving straight at Magnus’ and Alec's car. Before anyone could do anything, the cars crashed. Everything went dark._

 

_When Magnus woke up again, the first thing he felt was the banging in his head. He groaned, trying to open his eyes. He realized he was upside down. Somebody was pulling him from the car. “Alexander…” he whispered. He couldn't see him. Where was he?_

_As somebody laid him next to the car, Magnus finally saw his husband. Alec was lying next to him, blood covering him. Magnus gasped, freeing himself from the person who dragged him out of the car and started crawling toward his lover._

_“Alexander…” he whispered, when he finally reached the other man. “Mags.” Alec chuckled lightly._

_He looked horrible. His face was covered in bruises and his body was covered in blood marks. Magnus started sobbing._

_“I am so sorry.” He whispered, taking Alec's face in his hands. “I am so sorry Alexander.” He whispered. The younger man put his hands on Magnus’, stroking them carefully._

_“It's okay baby,” he whispered, tears in his eyes, “it's okay, it wasn't your fault Magnus.” Magnus cried, hiding in Alec's neck._

_“Mags, baby, look at me, please.” Alec begged, coughing. Magnus looked up on him, stroking his cheeks._

_“I love you Mags, I always will, don't you ever forget that.” He said from last energy he had. “I love you too Alexander, I am sorry.”_

_Alec shook his head. “We will be okay.” He tried to reassure his lover, but his eyes were closing. “Alec.” Magnus called him quietly, brushing his hair as he was lying next to him. “Darling don't sleep, you can't sleep.”_

_Alec opened his eyes. “I don't think I am strong enough.” He whispered and Magnus sobbed again. “No.” He cried. “Alexander, you are the strongest person I know.” He whispered, putting their foreheads together._

_“Just don't sleep okay?” Alec looked on him with tears in his eyes. “It hurts.” He whispered almost silently. “You will be okay love, just stay with me, okay?” Alec tried to nod, but he was weak._

_“It's not your fault Magnus.” Alec whispered, but Magnus shook his head. “I am sorry Alexander.” “It's not your fau-” he caught. “It's okay, you're okay.” Magnus said, but mostly reassuring himself._

_“Don't be sad Mags.” Alec whispered, but before he could continue, Magnus kissed him lightly on the lips. “Shh, don't talk,” he whispered, “just focus on staying with me, okay?” Magnus cried quietly, “O-okay.” The younger man whispered._

_“You know, I love you so much, that I will come after you even after my death as a ghost.” Alec tried to ease the mood, but Magnus only shook his head, crying in his shoulder. “You will live Alexander, you will live and we will have children and small house by the coast.” He whispered. Alec smiled._

_Alec's eyes closed again. “Alexander.” Magnus sobbed. “Wake up, please.” He cried, pulling Alec closer to himself. “Just few more minutes. Please.” The younger man opened them few seconds later._

_The sun was slowly coming up. “Look darling,” Magnus whispered, “the sun is coming up.” Alec blinked few time, to push away more tears._

_“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine…” he sang quietly and Magnus cried when he recognised the song. “You make me happy when skies are gray.” He joined him in the singing, hugging Alec as close as he could._ _  
_ _“You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away.” He cried at the few last words, reminding him of where they were._

_“Tell me something nice.” Alec asked after while and Magnus stared at him. “I don't… what do you want me to say?” He chuckled desperately. “I uh… do you remember when I was sick and you were taking care of me?” He chuckled at the memory._

_Alec nodded almost invisibly. “And I tried so hard to not make you sick, but I really couldn't help it and sneezed right in your face?” Alec smiled. “I scared you so much you fell from that damn bed.” Magnus chuckled sadly as Alec did._

_“But I loved you anyway.” He whispered, his hand reaching for Magnus’ which was stroking Alec's cheek carefully. “I am irresistible.” Magnus joked, tears streaming down his face._

_“I love you Magnus.” Alec suddenly whispered, his hand touching Magnus’ cheek and brushing it softly. “Don't you ever forget that.” Magnus sobbed, leaning closer to Alec and kissing him on the lips carefully. “I love you more Alexander.” He tried to joke, but failed miserably. “Impossible.” The younger man tried to smile._

_His eyes closed again and his breath slowed down. “Alexander.” Magnus sobbed. “I love you. I love you so much.” He cried as he was holding Alec's body._

 

Magnus was lying on the cold ground, hugging himself and crying. “Alexander…” he whispered, his hand reaching toward the gravestone.

“I am so sorry.” He whispered, the memories finally coming back to him. “I am so sorry it took me so long to find you.” He sniffled. “I am so sorry I couldn't save you.” He started crying again, curled next to the stone.

He wasn't sure how long he was lying there, but he didn't care. Eventually the sun hid behind the horizon and the darkness started surrounding the heartbroken man.

It was only then,  when he couldn't see anymore when he stood up, dried his still fresh tears.

“I am so sorry it took me so long to come back Alexander,” he whispered one more time, “I am not leaving you again.” he sniffled.

He wanted to sit down when suddenly a bright light blinded him. Magnus looked up and in distance saw the train that just arrived on the station.

Magnus moved his gaze back to the gravestone. “Are you trying to tell me something?” he whispered, his voice hoarse from hours of crying. He waited but nothing happened.

“Please?” Magnus begged. “Please just tell me something. Give me some sign what I am supposed to do.” He cried. Desperate, not knowing what to do.

The train afar honked and Magnus looked up.

“There's still one more station…” he whispered for himself, standing up. He looked back on the gravestone one last time and touched it. “I will come back, I promise.”

With that he slowly walked toward the train station. He got on and sat to his typical seat. The train was completely empty. Magnus sighed as he pressed his forehead against the glass and looked outside.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts so far?


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Station 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are almost there!

_When the ambulance arrived, it was too late. They found the two men in tight embrace. The rescuers checked on their vitals and found out that it was too late to save the younger man, however the other one was still breathing dimly._

_And when they tried to separate them, they were surprised by the strength they were holding onto each other. The rescuers had no other choice then to divide them by light force._

_When they finally managed to put the older man in the ambulance, they closed the door and connected him to all kinds of machines and breathing ventilator._

_Meanwhile they hid the other man under white blanket and internally felt bad for the couple that was parted by such accident._

_The police called on the place of the car crash investigated all the causes and in the end concluded that the fault was fully on the part of the car that was overtaking._

_The ambulance was hooting as it was drifting through the the streets to the closest city, as it was driving to…_

 

Magnus stood up from the seat as the train stopped. He walked out of the door and was surprised that the station looked different than when he was getting off there everywhere. He was standing in front of

 

_The hospital. The ambulance parked right in front of the entrance and many nurses and doctors ran off the building toward the bed where the Asian man was unconscious lying._

_They dragged him in one of the operating room, meanwhile they called for his family and family of his husband._

_The man was in the surgery for many hours, the doctors doing the best they could, for now he was lying in the room._

 

Magnus walked in the building with clenched heart. Once again it seemed his legs knew the way and slowly walked toward one of the rooms.

Magnus was momentarily standing in front of the room marked as 112. He took deep breath and with shaking hand opened the door.

He gasped when he entered the room. Magnus saw himself lying in the white bed. Connected to many tubes, sleeping. He also lost few kilogrammes. He looked slimmer.

Magnus felt as if he was watching a movie. He was watching himself lying in the bed, day and night were changing quickly. People were coming in and leaving. Some of them were the doctors and nurses, the rest were family and friends.

He saw Izzy, she was coming every day and she was sitting next to his bed, talking to him, telling him about her day. Then Raphael and Catarina also came very often, he saw Simon few times and Clary with Jace also appeared once or twice.

Suddenly the time slowed down and Magnus saw Raphael entering the room and closing the door behind him. He walked over to Magnus’ bed and sat next to it.

Raphael was sitting there few minutes in silence, looking on Magnus, before he finally spoke up.

“Hi Magnus, it's me, Raphael. I don't know if you can hear me, but I have to say it anyway.” He started, “it's already few days since you are here. And you're looking much better already, nothing your make up skills couldn't hide.” He chuckled, tears shining in his eyes. “How are you Mags?” He continued few seconds later. “I am not gonna lie, I have no idea how you feel.” He sighed. “I am so sorry Magnus, they were too late and couldn't save him. I am sorry Magnus, I know how much you loved him.”

He quickly dried the tears falling from his eyes and was silent for few minutes, looking out of the window, before looking back on the sleeping man.

“Mags, I know it's hard, I know you might want to stop fighting now he's gone, but you can't leave me here, you hear me?” He cried, clutching his hand tightly. “You're my friend. My family… so please, don't give up. I know I have no right to ask you this, but please.”

Magnus felt the tears falling down from his eyes. He loved Raphael. He was like his brother. And hurting him, that was the last he wanted to, but the pain was too big.

Suddenly the times moved forward quickly. Day became night and night ended, beginning new day. Raphael disappeared and another person entered his room.

Jace. Magnus was actually surprised to see him there since they weren't much of friends. Jace was used to be in the centre of attention and when Alec started dating Magnus, he lost that place.

“Hey man,” he greeted awkwardly, “you're probably asking yourself what I am doing here… well I am questioning the same thing… but I guess I just wanted to clear things between us…” he stuttered, “in case… you know what…” he paused as he started pacing around the room.

“I don't hate you, you know? I was jealous, of course, he was my best friend and then you came, stealing him away from him.” He sighed as he sat in the chair again. “I guess I can't really be angry on you… he loved you.” He cleared his throat, before he continued, “And I am really glad he found you, because what matters to me more than our friendship is his well being.”

Magnus couldn't believe what he was hearing. Jace Wayland excusing to him? He never believed he would live to that. Well, Alec didn't… Magnus realised that none of them had actually said Alec's name so far.

He knew he was dead. And nothing was going to change that. He suddenly felt so angry on world. Everyone was tiptoeing around him, but it was meaningless. They couldn't change anything.

The time shifted again. It was another day and the next person sitting next to him was Magnus’ good friend. “Catarina.” He whispered.

The woman sat on the bed next to Magnus and took his hand in her own. “Hey Magnus,” she smiled sadly, “it's already two weeks since we last talked. I miss you. Please come back.” Cat cried into his shoulder.

“You are one of my best friends. I need you here Magnus.” she said when she calmed few minutes later. “So get your shit together and wake up. For me, alright?” Magnus chuckled. Typical Catarina. Kind woman, but she knew how to get what she wanted.”

“I already lost Ragnor, I can’t lose you as well.” Magnus started crying. He remembered how hard it was, when Ragnor died. Especially for Catarina who always liked him more than just friend. They went only on few dates, before the tragedy happened.

“I don’t have anyone except you.” she cried, standing away from the bed and headed toward the window. As she was looking outside, the silent tears were falling from her eyes. “I miss my friend Magnus. I miss you, okay? So please Mags, don’t leave me.”

The time fastened again and Magnus saw Catarina leave, being replaced by another visitor. “Biscuit.” he smiled when the red haired girl entered his hospital room.

“Hey Mags, something new?” the girl asked, sitting on the chair next to Magnus’ bed. “So remember that guy I liked?” she asked sheepishly and Magnus chuckled, I do, he nodded. “I don't think it's going to work…” Ohh, Magnus sighed, “I am spending so much time thinking about you probably. Huh…” Clary chuckled nervously. “In platonic way of course.” she laughed and Magnus smiled.

Before Clary could say anything more, the sky outside darkened and lightened again. The girl disappeared and instead of her came the last person Magnus ever expected to come.

“Maryse.” Magnus breathed out. What is his mother in law doing here? She never liked him. But everyone probably changes, right?

“Good morning Magnus.” she greeted him quietly, standing next to his bed. “I see they are taking good care of you.” Magnus frowned. Did she just came to blame him for what happened?

“I came to tell you that I don’t blame you.” she said with shaking voice. “I don’t.” she shook her head. Magnus froze. Who are you and what have you done to Maryse? He thought.

“I know we have had many misunderstandings....” she continued and Magnus scoffed, that is an understatement. “I know I never approved of your relationship…”

Magnus was trying to understand what was happening. Maryse continued speaking. “I… Al-... My son was happier when he was with you and… uh… I just want to say thank you.”

Magnus blinked quickly, that was not happening. “So, thank you Magnus, for loving my boy.” she said quickly, blinking away the tears.

The woman stayed quiet for few minutes before speaking up again. “Also, if you wake up… I would like us to be friends… I know I probably don't deserve your forgiveness, but I just want to make things right. I failed my son, but let me at least make it up to you.”

The tears were streaming down her cheeks, but she didn't hide them anymore. “I was bad mother, but I want to make things right for once, and hopefully there's still time right?” She chuckled sadly. “I am just asking for second chance Magnus.” She whispered as she stood up.

“I want to understand what my son saw in you. I want to understand what he was like when he wasn't around me.”

Maryse dried her tears and headed towards the door. Right before she left, she turned around one last time.

“But if you decide that you want to stay with him I understand, tell him that I am sorry.” With that she left and Magnus felt like he could breathe again.

This was the last thing he expected. His almost mother in law was trying to make this right… but it was too late.

Her son was gone and no one could bring him back.

The time changed again. The star night changing into another sunny day. The next person who came to visit him was Isabelle. Magnus chest clutched. The young woman was like his small sister, except she was Alec’s. She must have been devastated.

“Hi Mags.” she whispered as she walked to the bed and sat on the chair next to it. “How are you?” she asked quietly, taking his hand in between hers.

“Hi darling.” Magnus whispered, somehow feeling that something important was going to happen. “I know you are probably already tired of listening to me.” Both of them chuckled. “I could never.” He said.

“I am sorry about last time.” She suddenly sobbed. “I was just sad and angry and I had no right to say those things.” Magnus frowned, not understanding what she was talking about. The woman was crying next to his bed and Magnus was so confused.

“Why?” He asked even thought she couldn't hear him.

Few seconds later when she calmed down a bit, Izzy spoke up again.

“It's okay if you don't want to fight Magnus. I know you loved Alec. I know how much he loved you… and losing him… no matter how much I need you Magnus, it's your choice if you wake up or not…”

Magnus gasped. So this is what it was all about.

“The doctors have done all they could do Mags. They saved your life. So what happens from now on depends on you.” She sniffled.

“It's up to you, if you decide to wake up or not.” She was holding his hand tightly. “Just remember we are here, we need you… but… but if you decide that the pain is too big… it's okay. We understand… I understand.”

Suddenly it became too much for Magnus. He couldn't breathe. It hurt. His whole body hurt. It was like a huge wave of feelings crushing him.

He ran out of the room. Not quite sure where he was headed. He needed to get away.

He found himself running back to the train station and sitting in the train.

It was empty.

Just few seconds after Magnus got on, the train started moving and drove back to the first stop.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Magnus has to make the choice… what it will be? Stay tuned for last episode!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Station 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here we are, the last chapter… enjoy :)  
> |Also there won't be any stories soon, because I need to focus on my school, but I am no going to lie, I already have a new idea for story ;)

As the train was passing the stations, Magnus remembered all the memories of Alec.

 

11th stop.

Magnus was looking out of the window, the raindrops falling on the glass. He remembered as he was driving with Alec in the car on their so called honeymoon.

As they were singing all the songs playing from the radio. It took Magnus some time to persuade Alec to sign as well. He had nice voice. Magnus loved listening to him.

And then the accident happened.

No matter what everyone told Magnus, he was blaming himself. Alec shouldn't have died.

 

10th stop.

He remembered how they talked about their wedding and future they wanted.

The night they got married was one of Magnus’ happiest. He was no going to spend the rest of his life with the love of his life. What better could he have asked for? They were talking about raising children together and having nice house on the coast…. But some things just aren't going to happen.

 

9th stop.

His thoughts moved to the night when he planned to propose to Alexander, and how surprised he was, when the younger man beat him to it, just minutes before.

They walked to the park where they first met and Magnus was preparing this whole sprach in his head. Wanting this night to be unforgettable.

And it truly was, but Alec beat him. He kneeled in front of him and asked him the question he was planning to ask just seconds later.

And honestly, isn't that the perfection of totally destined relationship?

 

8th stop.

When they were in the gallery, Alec told him about his parents. Magnus met them but as they expected, it didn't go as well as they would wish to.

Alec was trying to ignore it, accept that his parents won't be a part of his life, but Magnus could see how disappointed he was. He did his best, to make it up to him, so family didn't meant disappointment to him. He wanted Alec to see family as love. Because that's what it was for Magnus. Alec was going to be his family.

Magnus told him about his family and Alec welcomed him in his arms. Magnus haven't felt more welcome in his life, because, and he didn't even know it at that time, Alec was his new family.

 

7th stop.

Being with Alexander was a challenge. Magnus soon realised that his lover was very shy and he didn't want to pressure him in any way, so when Alec asked him what they were, Magnus couldn't be happier.

Dating someone is one thing, but making it official… of course there were people who didn't approve of their relationship, but as long as they had each other, Magnus really couldn't find himself to care about others.

 

6th stop.

His second date with Alec was so much fun. Magnus loved making the younger man blush and laugh. He never wanted to stop it.

Actually it was very easy. Magnus would say a lot of innuendos and that was all it took for Alec to start blushing. And Magnus loved it. He was aware it was going to be long way, before Alec opens to him, but he was sure as hell that it was worth it. (It was)

 

5th stop.

Magnus still remembers their first date. Alec was so shy and nervous, but every single minute he made Magnus slowly fall in love with him.

He was so careful around him, afraid that he could do or say something that would scare Magnus off, but what he didn't knew, was, that Magnus wasn't going to let him go that easily.

 

4th stop.

Their first kiss, if Magnus can call it that, was Magnus best night ever (except the night Alec proposed to him and the night when he became his husband). Until then he wasn't even sure if Alec liked him, but he decided it was worth the risk. The New year kiss Magnus could never forget. The night when Magnus found his man and decided to never let him go.

 

3th stop.

The first time Magnus saw Alexander. He was all alone and Magnus felt bad for him. He wanted to make this man to smile. And he did.

They spent the whole night talking about everything but nothing and Magnus couldn't be happier.

He was aware that it wasn't going to be easy, but Alec for sure worth it.

 

2nd stop.

The train stopped and the door opened. Magnus looked up. A familiar figure appeared in the door and entered the wagon. Magnus gasped as he recognised the incomer.

“Alexander.” He jumped from his seat as he ran toward him and crushed him in tight embrace.

“Magnus.” The younger man smiled, nudging into his shoulder. “Hi, I missed you.” He whispered and Magnus looked up on him.

“I am so sorry it took me so long to remember you. I am so sorry about everything. I am not leaving you again...” Alec silenced him by a kiss and Magnus got lost in it.

“It wasn't your fault Mags,” the younger man whispered again, his hands brushing Magnus’ cheeks, drying the tears.

“I told you many times and I will always continue reminding you.” He smiled on him. “I love you.”

Magnus sniffled. “I love you so much Alexander, you have no idea.” The younger man chuckled. “I think I do.” He leaned closer to kiss him again.

 

“But Izzy was right.” Alec suddenly pushed away from Magnus. “You have to decided darling.”

Magnus blinked few times. He knew what they were talking about. Either he could wake up and live without Alexander, or he could leave and stay with his love forever, leaving his friends behind.

“I...I can't, Alexander… you can't ask me that…”

“I am not asking you anything Magnus. You need to decided.” He took his Magnus’ head in his hands. “Just remember, I will love you and nothing is ever going to change that. It doesn't matter how you decide. Okay? I love you.” The tears were streaming down Magnus’ face.

 

The train stopped.

One last station.

One choice.

 

The door opened and strong light filled the wagon.

Magnus looked on his husband, who was standing there, smiling on him.

He had to choose. All his friend that need him, or the love of his life, that Magnus needs?

What should he say?

“I am so sorry, but our friends still need me, I have to go.” or should he say, “I am so sorry it took me so long, I am not leaving you again.”

 

He looked up on his husband and slowly walked to him. “I love you so much.” He said as he pulled him in a kiss.

 

“I am so sorry…” he whispered.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what was it? What did Magnus say? Which way did he decide? Let me know your opinion in comments! (Please I really wonder what people think he chose) :)))

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you think, thanks so much for your feedback! Come for tomorrow update!


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